The Happiness Mistake Almost Every Entrepreneur Makes

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WAYNE RIVERS: Hi everyone. This is Wayne Rivers at Performance Construction Advisors where We Build Better Contractors.

This week I want to talk about the happiness mistake that almost every entrepreneur makes. Okay? This comes from an article from, I might butcher this, Dmytro Korchevskyi in July of '26, and let me just read how he begins his article. "After building 50 education centers across 10 countries, I discovered that achievement alone doesn't make life better. These three principles changed how I define success." He continues, "I remember the moment I realized my employees were happier than me. From the outside, I had it all. 50 education centers across 10 countries, thousands of students, several successful businesses. But while others clocked out at 6:00 p.m. and switched to their lives, my workday never ended. Like almost every entrepreneur, I started my business for freedom. Wow. To travel, spend time with family, give gifts without counting.

Money was supposed to be the road to that life, not the destination. My way out began with a simple decision. I stopped carrying everything alone. I stepped out of operations and delegated what I'd managed myself for years. And when I finally had time to live, not just work, I was able to articulate what had happened to me." Does that sound familiar? Does that sound familiar? Everybody else goes home at 5:00 or 6:00 and you wake up in the middle of the night worrying about what's coming, what's happening? Yeah. What about this is important to you? His story is your story. His story is my story. We can all relate to this. So what are his three keys to breaking out of this pattern? He said, number one, seek contrast, not altitude. He talked about two glasses of water, a glass of water that you drink in the comfort of your home and a glass of water that somebody hands you when you've been lost for days in the Sahara Desert. Same glass of water, but really a great deal of difference in how you appreciate that.

He calls that the delta. And where have you heard that before? Dan Sullivan, The Gap, right? He says, think about the gap between where you are and where you were. That's how you appreciate things. He talked about the term hedonic adaptation, which is the new normal. Again, Dan Sullivan. So we achieve something and we're happy for a little while or we build a new project that's our biggest project ever and it comes out a huge winner and the customer's so happy. So we enjoy that for a very short while, but then we realize this, what psychologists call hedonic adaptation. That's our new normal. Right? And we go from $50 million of volume to $100 million of volume and profits grow and more employees. Well, we adapt. That's our new normal. And we do a new thing and a new thing and a new thing and it's our new normal.

Things don't make you happy. That gap is how you remain happy. Think about where you started. Think about the trials and tribulations you had to overcome and think about where you are now, and then you can appreciate that delta, that gap as Dan Sullivan would call it. It's the key to appreciation, really, is what it comes down to. All right. He said, two, get rich in the right currency. He knew a serial entrepreneur and eventually he could only talk about money. He couldn't talk about books or travel or anything. It's all about money and the guy became very boring. He says, "What's the right currency?" The right currency ultimately is relationships. And this goes back to, oh gosh, I've already forgotten his name. I've already forgotten the book. I just talked about it last year. The long-term Harvard study that demonstrated that relationships are the key to long-term happiness. There's some points in your career when you want to achieve and that does create some happiness, but ultimately that happiness comes down to relationships. That's the currency you should be seeking.

The third thing, don't adopt someone else's unhappiness. We have all experienced toxic people in our companies and in our lives and stay away from those people. They suck the life out of you. What did my wife... There was a show she watched and they had what was called an energy vampire. Those are the people that just suck the life and the energy out of you. I'm not saying abandon people when they need you. That's not it at all. I'm talking about the people that are chronically unhappy. Those are the kind of people you need to excise from your life. Surround yourself with people who energize you and who lift you up in your life. And then finally, he quotes Dr. Viktor Frankl, "Happiness can't be pursued." Thank you. "Happiness can't be pursued. It ensues." Does that make sense? Seeking, trying to attain happiness through step A, B, C isn't the way it works. Happiness ensues from the things that we accomplish, the people that we love, the experiences that we have. Happiness follows. It's not something you can chase and wrestle to the ground.

What do you think? Are these three steps sensible and things that you can easily add into your life? What did he leave out? Email me at [email protected]. This is Wayne Rivers at PCA, where We Build Better Contractors.

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